70s · 70s vintage · blogger · Christian · Christian blogger · christianity · clothes · clothing · fashion · flower hairclip · hair · hairclips · Justice Pirate · modest fashion · modesty · outfit · street fashion · Victoria · vintage

And I Sift. . .

floraldress3thumb floraldress2thumb floral2thumb[Outfit details: flower hairclip – Lila-Jo | Vintage 70’s dress – Vintage Code | Shoes – Modcloth]

I leave myself vulnerable and open for many critics on the internet (and people I know in person, even some who I considered close friends).  When I see people in person who say, “I read your blog the other day…” I wonder if they are going to be honest with me about their thoughts or feed me flattery.  Some people end up opening up to me in response; telling me things that they have gone through, and I love that.  A lot of people appreciate my openness and the ones who seem to not understand it tend to keep it to themselves or try to rip me apart on the net (this includes people I’ve spent time with in person).

I don’t pretend to have it all together, because I don’t have it all together.
I consider how many bloggers seem to have little words and leave dreamy photos to make their life depictions seem like a faerytale.
Who are they really? What do they hold back? How are they suffering? Many hide it all with their smiles and materialism.
I am raw.
I am real.
I come with frustrations; I come with much joy; I come with great peace, and I come with heavy burdens.  All of that I leave at the feet of my King, Jesus Christ, and when I decide to share it here with others, it is because it helps me feel more of a release of my burdens.  I recently found out that I think WHILE speaking, and that includes while typing.  I would love to be one who thinks before I speak, and lately I have improved greatly in that area.  I get that not everyone is going to understand me.  They’re not all supposed to.

I’ve learned to sift.
As people try to proclaim their hateful words to me or attempt to misjudge me or break me down because they don’t like my opinion differing from theirs, I have found that sometimes my life involves a sense of panning for gold. There will be a lot of junk in my pan and dirt and grit and fool’s gold, but as I continue to seek God through His Word, and as I continue to meet people or learn about others, there might be some grand gold nuggets I’ll come across.  This is why I sift. And I sift. . .

 In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. Though you have not seen him, you love him.Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls.” -1 Peter 1:6-9

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11 thoughts on “And I Sift. . .

  1. I am always amazed at how many people read my blog. Most of my church reads my blog. 🙂 haha And then there are a lot of other people who I never would have guessed who read my blog.

    I am real and raw too. I can’t sugar coat my life. That’s just not me. I want my real life struggles to help others. Otherwise, what’s the point of going through them?

    Panning for gold!!! Do you listen to Christa Wells?? She has a song called Panning for Gold. Get her CD How Emptiness Sings! It’s amazing. It got me through a lot of rough moments in the third trimester and during my labor. I LOVE LOVE LOVE her music.

  2. I enjoy reading your very honest and candid posts, because they’re not just rants and raves, but real life events with their not always so pretty details. You inspire with the way you learn from your past decisions to make you a better, more understanding and compassionate person. Most importantly you always bring it back to a message of hope, faith, love, and trust in God to get you through anything. Because of all of this, its easy for an imperfect everywoman like me to identify with you and your evolving process. We are all just works in progress, right?

    You look like an anime darling with that pink vintage dress and pretty pastel hair color.

  3. Victoria this dress looks so lovely on you! You are like a pretty spring flower 🙂

    Dude, people suck. I for one am TRYING not to be so judgmental to people, it is very hard. However, it is even worse when someone opens up and makes themselves vulnerable. :/ You are a lot more open on your blog than I tend to be, but then again I feel like not much is really going on in my life at the moment. Everyone’s blog is their personal space to do with what they want, so just because someone else’s content is not personal, it does not mean they have a right to pass judgement on you. How rude!

    1. I actually think you are a kind person who doesn’t pass cruel judgement, Sara. You have always been pretty respectful of me regardless of our differences, and I love that. Thank you.

      I think it is just that people get surprised to find out things about me and Rob that they never knew we went through and these are MAINLY people we’ve been around in person. . .and so they suddenly get upset knowing that we were different than they thought we were?? I think there are just a lot of misconceptions.

  4. Thank you for this. Sometimes, I sift out the venting in my blog too just because I don’t want to irritate my readers with my lengthy and seemingly useless posts. But then I realized I miss the old days of blogging when it was all about the text and not the photos. So every now and then, I rant and rave because it is my blog, after all, and I want to keep it real and raw and nothing would depress me more than to project an image of a perfect life.

  5. Pingback: Is Anyone Here?

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