I look back at my birthdays and my life and see that it was filled with blessings. A couple of years ago I would have listed you loads of things that went wrong in my life, but now I see that everything is a step towards God’s will for my life. I may not understand His will completely, but I am trusting Him with where He is taking me.
In reading stories of those who have lived in deep poverty, war torn areas, or have endured slavery, I can only see that I have had it very good despite the downs I have gone through. I haven’t suffered as they have suffered, yet I want to suffer with them because my heart aches for their pain. I don’t understand them, but am willing to listen and be with them, showing them love where they may feel as if they are unloved.
I may not have a lot of people in my life who I can say I am very close to these days, but I received an abundance of blessings today. My sons gave me beautiful cards and sang to me several times today. My husband went out of his way to treat me really wonderfully and I certainly know I am loved by him (he spoils me like crazy). I received phone calls from 5 people (three who had already sent/gave me cards), and a handful of sweet text messages. It may not have been much, but they all made sure to inform me they loved me (and I felt that love). I am special to these people while last week I cried from feeling deep rejection and pain for various things that went on throughout the month.
I felt such deep comfort from my Savior as if He took my hand and said, “I know. I know.” I don’t even know half as much as He! These hardships have built me up instead of tearing me to pieces. I can endure because my God is big!
This morning I was reading Matthew 27 in my Bible. If one has endured hardship at all, Jesus certainly did. Every single one of his friends fled after he was arrested. They said they’d follow Him forever, but they couldn’t endure the hardship of seeing their Messiah being taken from them. They didn’t want to associate with someone who had become a criminal. If one suffered rejection ever, it was certainly Him. I am so grateful that in His eyes, I was worth dying for. In His eyes, I am beautiful and loved. I want to live my life as He did.
I am certainly having an amazing 32nd birthday! This is going to be a great year for me!
“But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who have faith and preserve their souls.” -Hebrews 10:39